I have not posted for about 5 weeks. What an earth is going on?
My brain has felt scrambled and I couldn’t get a coherent thought together.
Barefoot running is the cause. It has slowed me down and made me question the other aspects of my life that move at 100 mph. It is not as simple as ditching everything and starting over. It was be so much easier if that was all it meant. Blogging has opened my eyes to so many possibilities and there are choices to be made. I feel like I have been travelling pell mell through the woods with no real idea where I was heading. It was time to stop and sit in a clearing for a while and consider which path to take next.
My financial situation drives many of my decisions and many of those decisions are driven by fear. It is fair to say that I fell headlong into the consumer trap. I learned my lesson and have been trying so hard to make amends that I may have lost site of living in the present. I have focussed so hard on a utopian, debt free point in the future that I am in danger of wasting today. I need to learn how to enjoy the here and now.
That old cliche about learning how to dance in the rain could not be more true. I need to live a little.
So..I haven’t posted but what have I been doing.
Although I have not been writing blog posts, I have not been idle. I have:
- Run barefoot for 109 consecutive days
- Realised that runstreak may not be for me and gone back to running about 4 days per week. This has allowed me to up my mileage.
- Set up a market stall selling interesting beer.(www.originalbeerdeli.com). I will be taking my exam for a personal alcohol license next week.
- Had my running technique analysed by James Anelay from Born Barefoot.
- Written an article for Barefoot Running Magazine
My brain was scrambled but it is now doing its best to seek order from the maelstrom. I am back to making notes and scribbling plans. I have mind maps all over the place and the world looks fresh and full of opportunity again
I am still sitting in the clearing but I am getting restless and I am ready to go. There are paths heading off in many directions. In reality, every moment of our lives are like that and some of the biggest changes in my life have come from split second decisions. There will be more of those to come but for the moment here we go:
- I have accepted that attaching my happiness to a utopian, debt free point in the future is misguided. I still need to work towards that point but need to be sensible and learn how to live a little.
- I am going to acknowledge that the only thing I hate about my job is the fear of losing it. I am going to allow myself to enjoy it and see how far I can take it.
- My favourite part of blogging is people. I am going to follow that line of thought and make both of my blogs more about people.
- I am going to keep up regular runs with barefooters across the northwest.
- I am going to learn more about beer and the art of tasting. I have always wanted to run a market stall and I am living the dream. Who knows where it will lead.
I needed to get this post out of my system. It has been clogging up the pipeline. I had no idea that when I started barefoot blogging that it would have such an impact on my life. I thought that I was seeking an alternative to my current job. If only life was that simple. I have learned that I love my work but that I have been wishing my life away.
OK- the rucksack is on and I’m ready to go – Let’s see where we end up.
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